Words of Encouragement for Labor and Delivery

What you say to someone in labor affects their birthing experience. Childbirth is hard, both physically and emotionally and many dig deep to find the necessary strength. Comfort in labor comes in many forms, though we often think about physical measures and pain-relieving medications. Another way to support a person in labor is by talking to them.

What you say to your partner or loved one can go a long way toward helping them cope. Whether they are having an unmedicated birth or getting an epidural, words of encouragement can make a huge difference in how they remember the experience of labor and delivery.

The most important part is being kind and offering support. Let the laboring person know they’re loved and that they can get through their marathon of labor. Stay upbeat and keep negative commentary to yourself.

What To Say To A Person In Labor

Here are some kind, uplifting and supportive things to say to a person in labor. When choosing what to say, consider the birthing person’s personality and their individual situation.

Hang in there! This simple phrase provides a note of support without a lot of pressure. It’s a very generic saying and it can get you out of a bind if you are not sure what else to tell them.
You are doing a great job! The birthing mom may not believe you, even if it’s true! Their experience of what’s happening is probably much different than what you are seeing. This means she may feel out of control while they look calm and collected. Encouraging words can give them motivation to keep going.
I love you! It might seem obvious, but the show of emotional vulnerability from a partner can mean a lot during this time. Remember to express your love often-something that doulas often suggest to their clients. Some partners report feeling an overwhelming sense of love as they watch labor progress; so this saying may come easily.
Think of the baby! During childbirth, it’s easy to focus on labor pain and forget the result: a little bundle of joy. To calm the birthing mom you can encourage them to picture the baby. You can also ask specific baby-related questions as a form of distraction: Do you think the baby will have a lot of hair? How much do you think they will weigh?
You are going to be a great parent! Many expectant parents have fears around what kind of caregiver they’ll be. If they are concerned about this, find out their specific concerns ahead of time and work them into your words of encouragement during labor. If they are scared they won’t know what to do during the newborn stage, say “You and the baby will work together to learn what each other needs.”
Amazing! This is a nice, quick word to whisper into the birthing mom’s ear when they have low concentration levels – such as when contractions are coming quickly. You can really use any single word with a similar meaning – incredible, wow, great.
Keep going! This is a nod of approval during a long labor – as in, “I know you are tired, and you are doing great so keep going”. You could also consider saying – “You’ve got this!”
I’m here for you. You won’t be leaving your loved ones side so make sure they know it. Even when you may be separated by medical personnel or birthing tubs, etc., your voice still can serve as a reminder that you’re still present. Words like “I’m not going anywhere” and I’m right here” can also be spoken.
Just a little longer now. Use this phrase if you are reasonably sure that it’s true.
A word of caution: don’t look back on how far you have come. That can feel overwhelming to a person in labor. Just give a sneak peek of what’s ahead: Tonight you’re going to be snuggling your new baby!
You’re doing it! When the birthing mom is pushing, this phrase can convey power and excitement. You can also help them see the baby with a mirror or touch the baby’s head as it emerges.